When I was a little girl, my best friend Roxy(not her real name) was obsessed with bridal magazines.
She had her dress,cake,venue,dishes,flowers,etc completely planned out by the age of six,
I remember asking her one day that if she was aware that a groom was part of the whole process and that she might want to factor him into the whole equation, and that after the party she was gonna have to wash some guys boxers or briefs at the end of the day.
I thought she was a bit "nutty" to be so obsessed with all this for one stupid day of walking down the aisle in a cloud of white taffeta(it was the eighties and tafetta was in)and maybe it was because I had two parents who did the marriage thing and it didn't exactly end happily ever after.
Don't get me wrong, every little girl dreams of that big day..that day when she is he most important and beatiful girl on the face of the earth. I just assumed that someday this would happen for me too, massive collection of bridal magazines or not.
Roxy got married all right, and the funny thing is she actually bought her wedding dress before she met her husband..so again the bit "nutty" part was validated.
Luckily for her, things actually worked out, and although I didn't attend, I am positive it was quite the show.
I however should have probably taken her lead and maybe started planning out my happily ever after at an early age, but unfortunetly I was too busy dreaming of walking down a different aisle..the red carpet.
So whats wrong with me??..how is it that most of my friends, my little sister, and everybody under the sun is married and I am at home watching the "Real Housewives of New Jersey" and eating lean cuisine from the microwave?
I am as far away from marriage as "Cher" is from her original face. I also think that having two parents who have married and divorced in the multitudes have made me a bit jaded.
Let me tell you something..being 36 years old and having to be out there in the "dating" world sucks!
I mean I see all these smiley happy in love couples who are so in love, and they always have this great story on how they met, and then they laugh and giggle and go copulate like rabbits and plan their platinum weddings.
Where are all these people meeting eachother??..not at any of the local bars or nightclubs I am going to on the weekends I'll tell you that.
I mean are there just single awesome guys just out there wandering around waiting for me to bump into them whileI am fixing the strap on my Jimmy Choo's? Perhaps one will just suddenly jump out from behind a bush to save me from a wild bear? Hey I know maybe "Mr.Wonderful" will be standing next to me in the express lane at the supermarket and notice all my single girl groceries and ask if he can take me home and grill me a steak?
Ya..this is what I am saying...I am so happy for all this love that finds everybody, but it seems to be way off course when it comes to me. In fact it is so off course that he is gonna need one hell of a GPS to find his way into my heart.
Am I bitter?...Nahhhhhhhh...just curious, maybe a little sad, and perhaps a little worried that if cupid doesn't get his act together, I am never gonna end up knowing what it's like to say he liked me so much he put a ring on it! I don't even want a ring at this point, maybe just a "hi it's nice to meet you, would you like to have dinner with me tomorrow night":)
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